What is a Bully?
How Do We Stop Bullying?
“Not everyone has been a bully or the victim of bullies, but everyone has seen bullying, and seeing it, has responded to it by joining in or objecting, by laughing or keeping silent, by feeling disgusted or feeling interested. ~ Octavia E. Butler
When you are just an average ordinary person, you are just a ghost, another face in the crowd.
Your fellow average Joe’s may try to establish dominance among themselves, to see who is king of the hill, but they dare not try those antics with the alphas among them.
The alphas, influencers, and bully’s in society seem to be put upon a pedestal like some kind of deity by the average Joe’s. Is it due to the alphas dominant personalities, or them being physically larger than others?
I know what it is, it is the average Joe’s man crush on their vision of the superior male.
(Que the song, Afternoon delight.)
The other group that seems to attract the attention of both of the afore mentioned groups, are the total losers, geeks, nerds, what have you.
I will never forget my high school days. Does anybody, no matter how old they get, forget those bygone days?
I made friends with a fellow student named Andrew. Now Andy wasn’t a big boy, or an extrovert so he appeared to be an easy victim for an overzealous bully. Andy however had a problem, his problem was one of anger control.
Now that I stop and think about it, I believe Andy was bi-polar. An enraged person with bi-polar disorder will easily stop a bully in their tracks no matter how big they are.
Andy reminded me of the oldies song, “Big John “, “If you spoke at all you just said hi to Big John.” Andy wasn’t big, but Andy wasn’t a safe target to bully.
There was an incident that happened after gym class between an intimidating bully and Andy. It was right after swimming class, and Andy had just dried himself off, and set the towel down beside him.
The bully picked up the towel, and snapped Andy’s back with it. Andy turned around, and the bully snapped Andy in the chest with it, and then said, “What are you going to do about it?”
We had slide in baskets for lockers back then, and had to use our own locks. Andy picked up his sock and dropped his large paddle lock into it. He then turned around and nailed the guy across the side of the face with it, and then backhanded him the other way to the other side of his face.
The Bully quickly dropped the towel and ran towards the sink and mirrors to check on the damage done to his face resulting from his foolish idea to bully my good friend Andy.
Andy on the other hand wasn’t finished. He followed the bully with the bloodied sock in his hand, and a blank look on his face. Nobody tried to stop Andy, but they all wanted to see what was going to happen.
The bully saw Andy walking towards him, and expeditiously got away from him.
Complacency is a bully’s favorite mannerism. Bullies don’t want to deal with an angry aggressive victim. They want a victim who will cry when bullied.
Unfortunately for this particular bully, Andy’s father was very strict with discipline. The old school, “Shut up before I give you something to cry about.” father. Andy told me later that his father would often beat him with the buckle end of the belt for no apparent reason.
His words still echo through my brain. “When you are used to being beaten with the buckle end of the belt, being snapped with a towel aint nothing but a love tap.”
Evidently Andy wasn’t in the mood for a love tap from his bully admirer.
I understood Andy, because my father thought the same way. Not eating what was on your plate wasn’t an option when I was a child. Option one was eating it all willingly.
Option two was eating the belt buckle until you were stricken with the realization that eating what was on your plate was much more desirable then the taste of blood in your mouth from a belt ripping across your face multiple times.
Those of you who had the option of not eating what was in front of you, had the greatest childhood in human history.
Bullies who think they can victimize anybody, are in for a rude awakening when they choose to target a child who is full of anger from years of physical abuse at home.
I would like to say now that I am older that I feel sorry for bullies who victimize those that they perceive are weaker than themselves, but I don’t.
Bullies will eat their humble pie sooner, or later. When they choose to bully an ANGRY LOSER like Andy, they are going to get what they deserve.
Now I am not saying you should use violence when dealing with bullies, but it worked quite well for Andy.
How do you stop bullying?
Stop feeding the bully your fears and tears. Feed the bully your anger, and a knuckle sandwich (as we use to say years ago.)
I understand now things are different, and there is a zero tolerance policy on self-defense, but back in the 1980’s the only person who got in trouble was the one who started it.
Self-defense was never a crime. When did we all become so soft?
Let’s go back to the old days, than we can stop bullying, and school shootings simply by standing up to bullies. Andy’s way.
Have you ever been a victim of bullying?
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